Day 28: Landmarks

a.k.a. Jireh
a.k.a. So Glad That's Over

a.k.a. A Lot of Shrek

I've been advised to write shorter posts, but I already know I won't. I also know for a fact I wouldn't read all of what I write. But, the purpose of my keeping a blog isn't really for it all to be read. Frankly, I'm surprised by those who do. I strongly recommend just looking at the pictures, skimming for anything interesting, and then reading the prayer requests. Sometimes, I'm not really sure why I write stuff. I think the primary meta is to get more people praying. Beyond that, I think God has done and is doing really cool things in the church here, and I'd like them recorded and shared. Also, I like that the people who want to, can keep up with what I'm doing and just generally be aware of me. Despite how intimidating the idea of being Known is, I think we're all made for it. Third purpose is for me to process what I experience. i genuinely think it helps me be more sustainable and in-tune with myself here. 

Anyway. Lots of landmarks today. 4 weeks in Costa Rica. 100 blog posts about Costa Rica. First time I've ever preached in Spanish. If you're willing to be generous, since it's past midnight and today is tomorrow, but still today, I've also been dating Alexis for 2 months now (1 in the same country, 1 in different countries), which isn't long, but is still crazy to me. 

Ok, so I woke up today, then went back to sleep. Then, I woke up again. This continued for a while. Let's fast-forward:

I got up and went for a run. Today was 3 miles, with a little bit of walking thrown in still. Someday I'll get mileage that feels like it actually counts. But, it's a green box day nonetheless. After running, I sat and watched the second half of Shrek with Izzy. It's been a while since I've seen it, but I was mostly putting off practicing my teaching. 

Shower, final tweaks on my teaching, then practicing. 

Then I watched Shrek 2. Then I took a "nap" where I laid in bed and just kinda prayed and listened to worship music. It rained, so I stayed inside instead of walking to the banyan tree park (Benemeritos, I think is what I said it was called?) to practice. Then, it stopped raining, so I walked to the AM/PM to take out some cash for the church's women's retreat (they've invited Katie and Izzy, I think Katie's going to lead some worship, which is dope). I practiced some more, then came home and took a nervous nap. 

Finally, after lots of waiting and pretending not to be nervous (i felt fairly sick to my stomach today, which happens when I'm extra nervous), we left for the church service. Matthew had been asked to lead worship, so I had been able to listen to him practice a bit, which had me really excited for worship (if still dreading what came after). 

Worship was lovely, then it was over. Suddenly, I was standing in front of their church and talking. I speed-talk when I'm nervous, but in Spanish I can't go too quickly or I'll get lost, so I think the pacing was really good. Fortunately for you and for me, I don't think they record sermons, so I guess I can't post any audio here and you'll just have to take my word on how it went. 

Usually all of my bad feelings happen before any kind of talk or presentation, so I felt fairly ok for most of it. My mouth kept drying out while I was talking, but I didn't choke or anything (that happens sometimes to me). I feel like I said everything I wanted to say, and didn't get stuck just reading my notes too much, though I would have liked to have felt less dependent on them. About 93% of the way through, I asked the church to share their thoughts on my topic (simplicity), and they jumped in and shared really insightful things, which was awesome. And, Lagos even shared a perfect transition into my closing, which meant that the flow was really good and where it was headed made sense. I finished with the gospel, which felt good. I think God was really merciful to me, linguistically speaking, because, even when other people were sharing, I was able to follow them and be on the same page without much "language lag." 

I think, maybe I didn't take it in exactly the direction that was expected or intended, but I feel good about it. And that is definitely not what matters, lol. As I was preparing today, I had to repent and talk to God a bit about my heart. Last time I spoke in church (3 years ago), I had trouble keeping straight what the goal was. I wanted people to come away from what I shared thinking, "Wow, Sam is really spiritual and really funny." And I had to repent of that. I think I did so in my teaching. This time, I caught myself wanting everyone to come away from my teaching thinking, "Oye, el gringo puede hablar bien en español y es tan maduro." So, I had to repent of that. I added a plea into my teaching for people to walk away remembering that God is worthy of an undivided heart. I hope that's what happened. 

I'm very glad it's over. I was so excited for summer-long projects because they meant I wouldn't have to speak in front of a church for a long time. At Fellowship, summers are the only time I'd be sharing, you see. So, I had found the perfect system! But, I was foiled by God. This happens often with this sort of plan. Oh well, it's good for me.

I got to have a really encouraging conversation with one of the men in the church after the service. There's so many people in this church that are just so cool. I wish I had more time and resources and Spanish to be able to connect more deeply with them. 

After church, we went to SmashBurger with Lagos, Ana Raquel, and Esther. One of their friends in the U.S. had offered to buy us all a meal, as long as it happened soon and we called him while we were eating. The food was really good. We had some kind of guacamole burger thing. It was lovely. While we were there, Lagos gave this friend a call and he gave them some amazing news. 

You see, even while I was prepping this teaching, I've been wondering about the ways he's moving and working in their lives. Regardless of what comes their way, they seem to handle it with grace and faith that low-key leaves me stunned. But, tonight, God used his people to do some very cool things and answer some very important prayers in a way that left me very moved. I probably could have teared up if I wanted to, but I had a burger to deal with. 

After dinner, I was weird and compulsive and organized all the plates and trash and cups while people watched and (lovingly) laughed at me. Can I blame it on being loopy after being stressed? Yes, I can. Would that be honest? No, not really. I feel weird sometimes, but I don't really mind. I'm still loveable, so. 

We came home and watched a movie. I'm going to Wordle now. 

It went ok, not great, not terribly.

Anyway, now I'm probably going to go for a walk then go to bed. It's late and I'm sleepy. Tomorrow, I think, is a genuine day off, so I'm curious to see what it looks like. I may run. I don't have to, so it would either be taking Sunday's run (that's allowed), or it would be a blue box. Maybe depending on how well it goes.

PRAYER!

-for us to walk more in step with the Spirit
-for continued good team dynamic
-thanks to God for all he's done today
-for our field trip with the CDI kids on Sunday
-for our team to Rest tomorrow
-ask God to tell you what he thinks of you

the homies eating burgers

It was a good burger